Axiom Home Page Forums General Discussion The Water Cooler Now or Never

Hey, Quebec!!!

At this very moment, France has dissolved its government. Now's your chance to swoop in and take over. After you've signed the P & S, we'll all help you move your stuff over there.

I'd love to, but I'm busy that day.

Aw, c'mon, Mark. All of our friends in Ontario would sure appreciate the new-found elbow room. You'd be remembered historically as a North American patriot. So you'd have to schlepp a few thousand vats of poutine---no biggie.

Maybe Rob Ford can be the new French President? Everyone involved deserves it.

Will there be pizza? I could change my plans if there's pizza.

We tried already. They wanted too much money. Actually, nobody wants Mr Ford anymore. He's well past his 'best before' date, he just doesn't quite know it yet.

And yet...
http://www.thestar.com/news/city_hall/to...ll-tracker.html

Apparently the Indycar announcers on NBCSN like Rob Ford. This does not say good things for the Indycar announcers on NBCSN. Considering one of them is Paul Tracy, well....

Well yes, 25ish% of Torontonians are either brainless, on drugs or totally whacked (or all three??), but the polls are very telling. Mr. Ford has no real room for improvement and over a longer term, is losing popularity.

The irony here is that I think he will actually clean up while losing the election.

Really, Fred, do you think there is any irony there? In the US, that's 'step one' of the process of getting re-elected NEXT go-round.

How many American Axiomoes think that we have more than 25% of the population who are functioning hydrocephalics?

Seriously, shine a bright light at a crowd while a friend stands on the opposite side. Have him count all the heads that are glowing a dull, rosy, pink on their opposite sides.

Yes, just like backlighting one's ear.

Start at the State Fairs that are all coming up---in every state. Yeah, that's a great place to start. 25%! Ha!

We go all the way around once. (Amusements parks are great for this, as are NASCAR events, Estate Equestrian events, 7-day- moving carnivals, ALL sporting events, pop/rock music shows, and Cirque du Soleil. We judge by gender and age, aiming for equal representation of both. Then we go around one final time and "crown" the cheapest (among age group) females and sleaziest males (again, by age group). There can be many winners, especially if the age-spread in attendance is broad.
Of course children aren't exempt! They may even be the "firestarters" at times.

Then, on the walk back to the car, we look at everyone going the other way and try to guess which ones are guessing to which group WE belong! Instant Karma can be fun.

("Hey, Bill, do you think that 50's-ish lady with the air-brushed wolf sweatshirt and the "blonde" hip-length hair thought I was sleazy?"

"Well, by now, yes, but at first, I think she thought you looked cheap.")

Edit: My fault! We're off-topic again. Were we talking about Quebec moving to France and offering assistance?

I just got a new favorite hobby. Thanks, Bob!

Mkay then. Is the cranial pressure getting a little high Bob?

Seriously though, why would Quebec want to take over a country that speaks funny French? Not to mention they're having serious political problems at home. The separatists don't gots no parliament to dissolve, let alone enough elected officials to take over more than a corner office or two.

Hmm... maybe they do need Rob Ford.

Fred, just because YOU don't need any of the extra closet space that would be left after Quebec moves to Europe, doesn't mean that others feel the same way.

Ontario, Newfoundland, and New Brunswick could use the whole place as a storage unit.

An empty Quebec won't work for storage. Everything would smell like spilled wine and cheese curds.

Roch Voisine would refuse to leave, just like he refuses to retire from his music career and would be skulking around everybody's stuff.

AND we already have a maple syrup shortage and your plan would simply cause a disaster!!!!

- Ontario would refuse to take care of the Maple Syrup industry because the majority of the population lives in the greater Toronto and Ottawa regions and they think a forester is just an ugly AWD car.

-New Brunswick has maple syrup skills but everybody is already in Albert working the oil fields or they have returned home and are too busy spending all thier money on four wheelers, snow mobiles and NASCar clothing.

-Newfoundlanders, while always cheerful and helpful, would just find some way to distill all the syrup into a maple flavored rum.

Worst of all!!!
Can you imagine the carnage if all of the Quebecers leave and Bonhommeis left alone and unattended. I imagine a rampage that we have not seen the likes of... well, since the demonic possession of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man in Ghostbusters.

Just look what happened the last time he got away from his handlers and tried to drop kick the Prime Minister. Not that I blame him,actually.



I'm sorry Bob. Your plan has merit but for the good of all. Quebec has to stay.

http://www.thestar.com/news/city_hall/to...n_new_poll.html

"Support for Ford grew 6 percentage points from early August, while Tory dropped 1 percentage point. Chow slid 2 percentage points while Soknacki dropped by 1 percentage point."

31% in the latest poll. Much more fun than "reality TV".

Andrew, you know much better than I on matters Canadoid, so I will defer. However, if by "all" you mean "only" the rest of Canada, then I'm still for the Trail of Poutine Tears to Toulouse.

Too funny Murph. I'll have a jug of that maple syrup rum you've been drinking.


For those of us outside of Toronto, yes.