It seems the more I try to figure this out the more my head hurts so I decided to ask the experts here for help and stop spiining my brain.
The components:
50" Panny Plasma 720p w/ 2 HDMI connections
Oppo DVD w/ HDMI, optical, 8 channel analog
Samsung BD6500 Bluray w/HDMI
Fios DVR w/HDMI
HK AVR 645 w/ DD & DTS
Axiom M50, M3, VP100

The goals:
Best sound from Oppo (used exclusively by me through AVR for concert DVDs)
Best picture from Fios (without changing any switches for the fam)with ability for me to get good sound from TV through AVR on the rare occasion (fam wont be doing that)
Best picture and sound from Bluray both with and without AVR
(Fam will probably only listen through TV unless I'm there)
What is the best way to hook this up without the aid of HDMI switches of which I have tried 2 so far and dont work?
The main considerations:
HK AVR 645 is about 5 yrs old and to my knowledge does not decode newer bluray audio codecs. TV only has 2 HDMI connections but does have optical out and I think maybe coax out. TV is 720p. TV is mounted on wall with low profile mount and cables through wall, really dont want to take it back down to configure this. I need for both the Fios TV and the Bluray to not need any additional steps to operate other than turn them on and set the TV to the right input.
I hope this made sense and appreciate any input

Does your HK have HDMI inputs?

Hi Dan, Thanks, Yes it has 2 in and one out

Also has 3 optical in, 3 Digital coax in and 8 channel analog

I'd get an external HDMI switcher or buy a new AVR.

AND get a URC or Harmony remote for the family.

I would probably go with a new remote, I have a UCR one and its actually pretty damn awesome with the macros. Very user friendly as you can program a button to turn on everything, change inputs all that jazz. you are going to have to change the inputs, regardless of what you want to watch , whether its changed the inputs on the tv to get your bluray/fio or changing the inputs on the AVR. In my experience, the less you mess with the TV inputs, the easier it is for people. Changing the output on a receiver sometimes is simpler. But really, one remote to rule them all would be your best route, instead of multiple remotes.

On the surface, just looking at your current set-up the stumbling block I see is that you have TWO players. Ideally, if you had an updated Oppo BR player(BDP 93 or 95) this would negate the need for switchers or even more costly, a new updated AVR. You would have the 8 channel analog out of the player in to your present AVR which would enable you to get the lossless sound codecs from Blu-Ray discs while at the same time getting full use of the video processing and upscaling of standard DVDs with the HDMI video connection going in to your monitor. This would still leave the other HDMI input for your Fios DVR. This would be a lot easier to program in to your remote as well.

As I see it, just one too many components here to simplify things while at the same time max out your performance.

You know, I think you're right! The logical answer is to deal with the heartbreak of retiring the Oppo (til the new one comes along one day) and let the Samsung BR take over. This BR has 8 channel analog so I could configure it that way now. If the signal coming from BR is analog how important is the DAC in the BR?

I didn't realize that the Samsung had an 8 channel analog out and I don't know much about the DACs in the player but I would suspect they would be more than adequate and as mentioned, it would meet all your needs without having to go out and buy an updated AVR, at least for now. The only possible downside might be the limitation of the player in setting up your bass management. The player's set-up here is usually quite rudimentary, although since you are doing this with your Oppo, you will already be familiar with it. It is usually never as good or flexible as the bass management system in your AVR.

Yeah, bass management through analog cables is usually not something that can be well controlled by either the AVR or the player - though check your options with your equipment. Otherwise, why not just let the BR player convert everything to LPCM and send it over the HDMI cable for everything? Then the AVR should be able to do the bass management.

Casey - I just more or less duplicated your thoughts in the other thread by the OP. I just happened to read that thread 1st and then got to this one.

In the interest of keeping it simple for the wife and kids my plan was to run the HDMI from the BR directly to the TV then run audio to the AVR seperatly. It seems the best audio solution for that is to run through the 8 channel analog even at the expense of some bass management??

My earlier H/K will do bass management on the analog inputs. His probably will too.

+1 for a URC or Harmony remote. Turning the multi-device complexities of AV gear these days into a single click experience is one of the most rewarding things you can do for yourself.

I prefer the URCs myself for their more powerful customization abilities but the Harmonys are easier to program.

I'm looking at them now, I am up to 5 remotes right now and it is out of control. Looking at URC R50, seems like a lot more capability for the money vs Harmony

Forgot to mention.
Getting a remote that is capable of RF to an IR Blaster instead of just line of sight IR is a nice feature to consider as well.

You can make the worlds best macro that turns everything on, sets all the inputs, chooses your sound mode, etc etc..... but you still have to train all your family that they have to keep the remote pointing at the gear for a few more seconds while it runs through the macro.

RF means that it won't matter what way the remote is facing as it steps through the longer macros. It is also useful if you are like me and have a theater room where the AV gear is in the next room, so no line of sight for IR only.

Good point..looks like URC RFS200 does that

My 2 cents on the remote (in my case a Harmony 880).....quote from my wife: "the remote is the best piece of equipment in your setup"

Agreed, Got my URC R50 yesterday, took all of 15 minutes to get the TV, Fios box and BR working with it, the wife was very excited to see 2 of 3 remotes gone!! This morning started working on macro for TV input of Bluray, had some difficulty (my first attempt ever at a macro on a remote) but was almost there when I ran out of time so will try again tonight. Next is Oppo DVD, HDMI switch and AVR, that will be 6 remotes down to one, a beautiful thing. Thank you all for the advice, I cant believe it took me all these years to buy one of these.