We live, we learn, we cut holes in the wall the size of a truck bed, we cry...

Odd. The $90 per hr. electrician I sub out for my clients does the same thing. Only he's installing wall outlets and pot lights.
He lives, he earns, I cry.

You pay $90 dollars an hour to install wall outlets??? What is your name and address, I'm coming to work for you God damn it!

Pick me up on the way! I'm going too!

I use to do electrical work for my Dad in the 70's for $15/hr.

I suspect he is paying a subcontractor $90/hr, essentially another company to do the work. I would expect the electrician is making around 1/3 - 1/2 of that cost which is still a pretty good wage, unless of course the electrician IS the company, if I am wrong I need to change my trade.

My employer bills my IT work out at $96/hr. I only get a fraction of it.

Your company is a bargain. My old company billed my IT work at $125-190 base rate. Discounts down to $90-150.

Lots of interesting things being said here.

I spent the majority of last night fooling around with placements. I tried nearly eight or so. I get get a boom, but it's hard without being muddy. I got sick of moving it around and just gave up for now. I placed one in the right corner in the room, and the other sub in the left.

An interesting point though, I couldn't connect both subs via the subwoofer out on the receiver. I got a bad hum through both subs when connected with a "Y" connector. So I hooked one up via the high left channel. So it's curious to have the dedicated LFE, and have the second sub firing the strictly the left channel bass. Made for an interesting gaming experience.

So I don't know what to do about placement. Certainly nothing seemed obvious. My couch sits against the wall. That wall is just framed with drywall. The opposite side of the wall is the furnace room. I wonder what it would sound like if the sub was in the room behind the theater, directly behind the couch. Thoughts? I would just try it, but you know... hole in the wall.

It sounds like you've got a ground difference between the two subs (the Y splitter bit). Perhaps remove the ground screw from one of them?

Were you connecting both subs to the same outlet? That hum is a ground loop, and is being caused by some issue with your house's wiring. If both subs on are the same breaker you shouldn't get the hum though.