On a less funny note, I saw a Today Show piece (about a month or two ago) where they mailed jewelry with known amounts of gold to about ten of these companies that buy gold. The amounts they got back were maddeningly low in many cases. Cash4Gold was one of the worst. I think they offered somewhere in the range of 10 to 20% of true value. A couple of other companies were about as bad, but some were surprisingly good, over 70 or 80% of value.
Seriously, baby, I can prescribe anything I want.