Rick, I'd bet that the one on the left write the caption.

Here's my evidence, from her high school yearbook:

Did they drop the house on the fire or something?

The news report is correct. It's FOX "news" after all, and they're in an alternate backwards universe.

If you saw the broadcast, the next caption said "the water was quickly put out with fire thanks to the slow response from our Russian neighbours water fighters department".

Actually, I think that CAN happen in Las Vegas.

If you didn't catch the 20th anniversary show of Absolutely Fabulous the other night, check your listings, as I'm sure they'll run it ad naseum until the next 2 installments arrive. It's running on LOGO, but if you're afraid you'll get caught, it's also on BBCA.

This time 'round, Jennifer Saunders trashes the Royal Wedding, Pippa Middleton's ass, the Kardashians ("Look," she says, pointing to a group photo of them in a showbiz mag, "in America, diseases have become celebrities!"), and hosts of other contemporary people and topics.

I was afraid I'd be disappointed. No way.

Funny Thing #2

You guys brought up Fiat in the Shoutbox, so I take no responsiblity for the synapses involved in this vision.

I saw one of JLo's Fiat commercials again last night. Night shot, shiny, abondoned, rain-slicked city street, hotel entrance with still doorman.

The camera zooms in to the bottom of the driver's door. A single shoe extends and makes contact with said shiny street and displays it's full reflection in the wet asphalt. (Of course, JLo wouldn't be caught dead in shoes that cost less than $15,000--the MSRP of the gussied-up Fiat she's "driving.")

So I'm thinking, she needs some men in the commercial with her; make it sexier, something for everybody. She's very small, so, for contrast, we need really tall ones, like, umm JP, Peter, and Ray----- you know, just to show how "roomy" it really is.

After she ascends the curb to the sidewalk, the three of them slowly emerge and stand smiling, together, forming a wall behind her, where the top of her "do" barely reaches their lowest ribs.

Because she is tricked out to the 9's, they will be wearing tuxedoes, but with clown shoes. (You know, about the same size they already wear, but in bright colors and patterns, to emphasize the Barnum quotient of the car's true capacity.)

The final shot will be on her face. As she begins to speak the closing line, we pan back to include our forum buddies. Everyone is smiling as she says, "Whenever I go out cruisin' with my friends, Andre and The Marfan Twins, we do it in style!"

C'mon, I'm depressed! But that did make me feel a lot better about myself.

Now, that's some funny stuff, right there.

I am typically amused by stories that include clown shoes out of their natural environment.

Me, too, but what does that have to do with this?

Yeah, J.P. Patches and clown shoes go together like PB&J.