Stab. Stabbity.

Stab stab stab.

Your Stabbities made me smile. Thanks!

This is why we have our customers sign a 'Statement of Work' on projects. It protects both sides from assumptions, surprises and undisclosed costs.

Of course, that's probably a bit to formal for that size of a project. Still, for repeat problem customers........

This was a first in 20 years....

I kind of thought that people understood that the disc they bring me would be the one they want copied.... not a "work in progress"!

"Hi, Kinko's? I had 500 Xerox'd pages made yesterday. Can I go back through them and delete a sentence? No? That's unpossible? But when I asked if you could make me 500 copies, I didn't expect you to do it. It was rhetorical, like."

"Sure, we can to it! But, it'll be an addition cost of $20 per disc. What? Our fault!? You're the sorry block that chose Kinkos!"

That, good friends, is, in Bob's little world, an oxymoron.

I've only had to do this once in a previous business I had, and three times in this one. I send them emails that politely, but clearly state:

"I feel strongly, before the work is even finished, that one of us may end up unhappy. At this stage of my life, I fear most that the unhappy person will be me.

I hope you can use some of my ideas and suggestions. Good luck with your project, trog-bitch!'

I'm only joking about the trog-bitch part.

People ask, "Don't they email back?"
"Yep, everyone."
"Well, what do they say?"
"If I opend it and read it, then I didn't end it."
"Aren't you curious?"
"No."

Note left for a recent (single) female client who'd been unruly:

"Left a bit early so I wouldn't have to see you. Since you've been working for Google, you haven't been very "Googley" when you come home. So, pick one:

A guy who always has your best interests at the fore and goes the extra mile for you every time. OR..

A new boyfriend to squat and piss on.

Email me when you decide."

She's still one of my best clients. I should write a book:

Client Management, with Bob

Edit: I forgot. Able-bodied people who stand still on escalators and moving sidewalks should be ticketed. Those who do the same, but are firmly planted in the middle of said device, should find themselves on a mobius-strip version of said device.

I'll buy it for sure. I'd ask for a signed copy, but I'm afraid.

[quote=MarkSJohnsonPS- she's the "Chief Development Officer" for this organization!

Grrrrrr.....
[/quote]

Mark, you know that means that she is merely the Chief Beggar for her organization. She's gonna use whatever you do for her as part of a suck-up presentation to a current or prospective mark, errr, I mean donor, while the other "development" people with her use the distraction to rifle through coats and handbags for big fat checks.

She doesn't have to know anything. She just has to be good at getting others to cough up. Remember, "Chief" or no, she's still just a beggar.

That may make it seem that I'm bitter about my professional years wasted in development, but I'm not. Really, I'm not. Bastards!

Escalator Rage?

People who can't stand still for one minute and rest while the escalator is moving.