Well, I'll follow up on my medical theme. An American traveled extensively through China, on occasion enjoying the pleasures of some of the young ladies and not using a condom. About a week after returning home he's horrified to see bright green spots all over his penis. He goes to his American doctor, who's somewhat puzzled, but after numerous tests he reports to him days later that "It's a rare disease called Mongolian VD about which little is known. We'll have to amputate".
Obviously unsatisfied by this, he decides to go to a Chinese doctor who might be more familiar with the problem. Sure enough, after just a brief look, the Chinese doctor immediately announces "Ah yes. Mongolian VD".
"What can you do?", the man asks. "My American doctor wants to amputate".
The Chinese doctor laughs "Stupid American doctors! Always want to operate! Make more money that way. No need to operate!"
"Oh, thank God!" the man replies.
"Yes" says the Chinese doctor. "You no worry! Wait two weeks. Dick fall off by itself!"
Enjoy the music, not the equipment.