For my money, I think it's still Onkyo.
Get as much Audyssey as you can (MultiEQ XT, Dynamic Volume, Dynamic EQ). Get lots of HDMI inputs.
I'm interested in the ability to control the receiver from an iPad or Android device. I'm also interested in streaming music from my network.
This
TX-NR809 refurb at A4L looks pretty good to me. God is in the details, and you'll need to do your own due diligence.
Getting a super remote (an MX-700, in my case) was the #1 best money I ever spent on my system by a wide margin. It made everything so much better for the rest of the family. I know the URC stuff isn't the leading edge any more, but you might consider whether a Harmony might make your wife happy.
