Mark, don't read this.

It's too late for next day delivery from Amazon by this hour, so the rest of you better have a decent excuse for his mailbox being devoid of Happy Birthday surprises tomorrow.

I honestly don't know why he puts up with some of you cheap and thoughtless bastards.

I'm sorry mine won't get there in time, either. I misjudged how long it would take to be fully desiccated.
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Always call the place you live a house. When you're old, everyone else will call it a home.