A husband was in BIG trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary.

"Tomorrow," his wife angrily told him, "there had better be something
in our driveway that goes from zero to 200 in two seconds flat!"

The next morning, the wife looked outside and saw a small package on
the driveway. She brought it inside, opened it .... and found a brand
new bathroom scale.

Funeral services for her husband have been set for Saturday


A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.