You are not logged in. [Log In]

Forums » General Discussion » The Water Cooler » Merry {Insert Holiday Here}

Page 1 of 3 1 2 3 >
Topic Options
Rate This Topic
#332444 - 12/24/10 06:54 AM Merry {Insert Holiday Here}
MarkSJohnson Offline
shareholder in the making

Registered: 09/27/04
Posts: 11445
Loc: Central NH
I posted this a couple of years ago, but came across it again last month, making me think I'll do an "encore presentation".

Freakin' Lazy, I know. But I gotta get on the road.

Seriously, whatever Holiday or Religion you observe, I hope each of you find Joy and Peace these next few days and into the next year. Please remember those that not only don't have the fortune of Axioms, but don't even have the fortune of safety, Family, Health or simple Nourishment.


'Twas the day before Christmas, and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, 'cept at Bridgman's (a Mouse!)

The Plasmas were hung over the chimney with care,
Of all of the choices, that's not the best there!

The forum members all were out shopping,
In their minds? New M80s a-hopping;

And Amie in her 'kerchief, and Ian in his cap,
Had just settled…for a long Algonquin nap,

When out near the docks there arose such a clatter,
Ian sprang from his bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window he flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

On the lake and Shania's roof, fresh fallen snow
Adding a lustre of piano-gloss sheen to objects below!

When… What? Could it really be?
Oh Gawd, a miniature Hummer (and on top, a tree)!

With a twinkle-eyed driver, St. Alan I see!
In the back another 800, Marked for CV!

More rapid than electrons, his coursers they came,
And he hummed (not sang), then called them by name;

"Now, Jack! now, Peter! now, TomTuttle and Ken!
On, JP! on Ray! On, Sean and Bren!

To the front of the Hummer! Quick! Make a Hitch!
All-wheel drive? Pffft! It's stuck in a ditch!!"

So they pulled and they heaved, "Give One More Good Try!"
A final tug and UP! They flew to the sky!

So up to the roof-tops, Alan he flew,
With a Hummer full of Speakers, and interconnects too!

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on my roof
The boom boom boom of a DSP woof.

And now a shimmer: Oh! A tweeter I hear,
Down the chimney came Alan and here's me, with no beer!

He was dressed like a Mountie, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with sawdust and soot;

A bundle of Epics he had flung on his back,
And he looked pretty old, yet still younger than Jack.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! His dimples: how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, Quick! Someone get Mary!

In his hands a huge package, (shut up Peter!), but what could it be?
On the side, "M-100"; and for under my tree!

The bass would be smooth, the mids oh so silky
I regretted that lack of beer; I only had milk-y

Alan had a broad belly and a big belt amids,
The cookies, at least, would last until Wids.

St. Alan had keen ears, townspeople say,
"Solid State", he would say, just like JohnK.

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
The sweet spot is now widened (and deepened!) he said.

He spoke not a word, but managed my bass,
(It's spelled with two esses, not an "e" stupid-face)!!

And Peaks and Valleys, now they are all gone!
Square room? Not me! Now it is Oblong!

He sprang to his hummer, and shouted Yallo…!
Not a B-stock here, all will be VasSallo!

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
"No Tubes! Digital Amps to all! Bye Now! Good-Night."
::::::: No disrespect to Axiom, but my favorite woofer is my yellow lab :::::::

#332446 - 12/24/10 08:09 AM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: MarkSJohnson]
Philippe Offline

Registered: 07/01/09
Posts: 282
Amen !
Nad C356 DAC & C515
Axiom M3v3
Grant Fidelity RPF-120 MKII
Analysis Plus Black Oval 12&10
JRiver 19

#332447 - 12/24/10 09:28 AM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: Philippe]
Adrian Offline

Registered: 12/27/08
Posts: 6926
Loc: It's all about the location.
Nice prologue, Mark, and hilarious poem!

Siskel and Ebert, two eggnogs up!

Merry Christmas everyone!!
Half of communication is listening. You can't listen with your mouth.

#332450 - 12/24/10 09:36 AM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: Adrian]
terzaghi Offline

Registered: 04/04/07
Posts: 4872
Loc: Tulsa, Oklahoma
Love it!

#332451 - 12/24/10 10:23 AM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: terzaghi]
Brent Offline


Registered: 03/13/01
Posts: 59
Merry Christmas all, the best of the season to you - enjoy your family then turn the music loud
Brent Tombari
Axiom Audio Expert

#332452 - 12/24/10 11:08 AM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: Brent]
Wid Offline

Registered: 06/22/03
Posts: 6832
Loc: The Peoples Republic of Il.

Merry Christmas to all. Have a safe and happy holiday.

"A fear of weapons is a sign of retarded sexual and emotional maturity." Sigmund Freud

#332454 - 12/24/10 12:05 PM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: MarkSJohnson]
alan Offline


Registered: 01/29/02
Posts: 3268
Loc: Toronto/New York/parry Sound
Hi Mark,

Great! I don't know how I missed it the first time you posted. In particular, I liked this stanza:

"And then, in a twinkling, I heard on my roof
The boom boom boom of a DSP woof." It even scans perfectly.

Plus thanks for pointing out the correct spelling of bass in a humorous mode. It's driven me crazy when I see it spelled "base."

Oh, and I'd be thrilled to have a huge package!

Best wishes to everyone for the season and New Year!

Alan Lofft,
Axiom Resident Expert (Retired)

#332458 - 12/24/10 12:50 PM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: alan]
terzaghi Offline

Registered: 04/04/07
Posts: 4872
Loc: Tulsa, Oklahoma
Merry Christmas to all,


#332463 - 12/24/10 01:51 PM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: terzaghi]
St_PatGuy Offline

Registered: 03/07/05
Posts: 7463
Loc: Glendale, Arizona
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone!!

Ha ha, I forgot about that poem. It's awesome! laugh
"Nothin' up my sleeve. . ." --Bullwinkle J. Moose

#332464 - 12/24/10 01:58 PM Re: Merry {Insert Holiday Here} [Re: St_PatGuy]
RickF Offline

Registered: 02/26/05
Posts: 5210
Loc: Vero Beach, Florida
Merry Christmas everybody!

Our Room


Page 1 of 3 1 2 3 >

Moderator:  alan, Amie, Andrew, axiomadmin, Brent, Debbie, Ian, Jc 
Forum Stats

15,392 Registered Members
16 Forums
24,305 Topics
430,504 Posts

Most users ever online:
2,082 @ 01/22/20 10:43 AM

Top Posters
Ken.C 18044
pmbuko 16437
SirQuack 13669
CV 11743
MarkSJohnson 11445
0 registered ()
313 Guests and
4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newsletter Signup