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Forums » General Discussion » The Water Cooler » On Dates and Oil
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#339702 - 02/23/11 05:20 PM
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![]() connoisseur ![]() Registered: 03/23/10 Posts: 3596 Loc: Massachusetts Badlands |
To our Arab Nation Friends:
Though we've all been excited for you and your little freedom fracasses, it's not about you anymore. Christianne Amanpour has gotten about all the face-time that was warranted. There are gaslines starting again around here @ the bargain retailers. I know it's only going to get worse. It's not our fault that we drink gasoline with every meal. Cars are cool! So are planes and trains and boats and delivery trucks and lawnmowers and snowmobiles, hedge trimmers. I could go on and on about the stuff we need that you're starting to screw with. And I haven't even gotten to plastics yet. So, since we can't afford a condo in Dubai, if you don't stop this crap, then dates are definitely off the menu. We'll still take your oil, even @ $175 per barrel, but, from now on, I'm wrapping bacon around scallops. Really, what else ya got that we want? No, I don't heat my home or light my lamps with dung. Those beautiful fabrics? Get 'em knocked off from China. How high are the import tarriffs on virgins? If we can't afford a whole one, we'll just keep buying her hair.
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Always call the place you live a house. When you're old, everyone else will call it a home. |
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#339728 - 02/23/11 07:33 PM
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![]() axiomite ![]() Registered: 03/07/05 Posts: 7463 Loc: Glendale, Arizona |
Bob is now our official foreign diplomat!
Um, you get like a coffee mug and stuff. Who says there are no perks?
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*********** "Nothin' up my sleeve. . ." --Bullwinkle J. Moose |
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#339736 - 02/23/11 08:03 PM
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![]() connoisseur ![]() Registered: 06/23/07 Posts: 4322 Loc: Sitting down somewhere |
That's damn funny!
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The only reasonable argument for owning a gun is to protect yourself from the police. |
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#339821 - 02/24/11 07:38 AM
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![]() connoisseur ![]() Registered: 07/24/04 Posts: 1443 Loc: Oak Ridge, NC |
Originally Posted By: St_PatGuy Bob is now our official foreign diplomat! Um, you get like a coffee mug and stuff. Who says there are no perks? I think he is one of those '60s activists? Is "Bob" really his name??
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"A fanatic is someone who can't change his mind and won't change the subject" Churchill |
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#339823 - 02/24/11 07:43 AM
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![]() axiomite ![]() Registered: 03/07/05 Posts: 7463 Loc: Glendale, Arizona |
Yeah, like HE'S gonna remember!
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*********** "Nothin' up my sleeve. . ." --Bullwinkle J. Moose |
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#339849 - 02/24/11 10:44 AM
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![]() connoisseur Registered: 12/16/05 Posts: 1467 |
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#339859 - 02/24/11 11:39 AM
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![]() connoisseur ![]() Registered: 03/23/10 Posts: 3596 Loc: Massachusetts Badlands |
Originally Posted By: danmagicman7 I feel like every BobKay post is deserving of its own blog. I am flattered by the word "deserving," even if it reads "deserving of execution." Being raised Catholic, I am deserving of nothing. That's why I wait until it's dark and God's asleep to run out and grab stuff. Holy Father, I confess to almighty God and to you, Father, that I have done nothing! Back off, or I'm gonna corrupt thousands more. And thanks for knowing when I'm kidding----which is always, and never.
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Always call the place you live a house. When you're old, everyone else will call it a home. |
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#339863 - 02/24/11 11:45 AM
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![]() axiomite ![]() Registered: 08/05/09 Posts: 6015 Loc: Milky Way Galaxy |
I like this saying, along similar vein:
"I asked God for a bike, then I learned that God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness."
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https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?...amp;usp=sharing |
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#339865 - 02/24/11 12:01 PM
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![]() connoisseur Registered: 12/16/05 Posts: 1467 |
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#339872 - 02/24/11 12:19 PM
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![]() connoisseur ![]() Registered: 07/24/04 Posts: 1443 Loc: Oak Ridge, NC |
I think I hear.....thunder?
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"A fanatic is someone who can't change his mind and won't change the subject" Churchill |
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