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#346808 - 05/01/11 02:20 PM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: CV]
ClubNeon Offline
connoisseur

Registered: 02/06/09
Posts: 3466
Loc: Western Maryland, USA
I dreamed about adapting that Indian movie I watched, 3 Idiots, into an American film, I was going to have it take place at the fictional college, Texas Institute of Technology.
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#346840 - 05/01/11 06:45 PM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: CV]
a401classic Offline
connoisseur

Registered: 11/29/06
Posts: 1328
Loc: Alpharetta, GA
Originally Posted By: CV
... I had to fiddle with the knobs to get it to work right. I'm not joking.


...<*****static*****> Hello Tokyo! Come in... <*** more static *****>
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My HT

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#346854 - 05/01/11 08:11 PM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: a401classic]
St_PatGuy Offline
axiomite

Registered: 03/07/05
Posts: 7463
Loc: Glendale, Arizona
LOL!

Good one, Scott!
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#346925 - 05/02/11 08:25 AM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: St_PatGuy]
BobKay Offline
connoisseur

Registered: 03/23/10
Posts: 3596
Loc: Massachusetts Badlands
I saw a poor old lady fall down in the supermarket parking lot yesterday. At least I assume she was poor, 'cause she only had $2.70 in her purse.
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Always call the place you live a house. When you're old, everyone else will call it a home.

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#349379 - 05/29/11 09:00 PM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: BobKay]
Adrian Offline
axiomite

Registered: 12/27/08
Posts: 6874
Loc: It's all about the location.
I applied for a job as a Lumberjack. They gave me the axe because I couldn't hack it.
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#349482 - 06/02/11 04:45 PM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: Adrian]
CatBrat Offline
axiomite

Registered: 08/05/09
Posts: 6015
Loc: Milky Way Galaxy
The other day I went downtown and into a shop. I was only there for about 5 minutes, and when I came out there was a cop writing out a parking ticket.

I said to him, "Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break?" He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a "Nazi." He glared at me and wrote
another ticket for having worn tires.

So I called him a "doughnut-eating Gestapo." He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, I didn't care. I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said "Obama in 08."

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#349493 - 06/03/11 12:33 AM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: pmbuko]
pmbuko Offline
shareholder in the making

Registered: 04/02/03
Posts: 16437
Loc: Ben Lomond, California
Did you hear about the guy who was in a freak accident at a research lab and froze himself to absolute zero?




He's 0K now.
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#349518 - 06/03/11 11:07 AM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: pmbuko]
Ya_basta Offline
connoisseur

Registered: 06/23/07
Posts: 4299
Loc: Sitting down somewhere
For those who don't know, Steven Hawking is on a comedy tour (or so I was told), and I heard that this is one of his best jokes-

You remember how your mom said that you shouldn't make faces in the schoolyard because your face might stay that way?



Well, I should've listened.
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The only reasonable argument for owning a gun is to protect yourself from the police.

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#352886 - 08/09/11 04:29 PM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: pmbuko]
pmbuko Offline
shareholder in the making

Registered: 04/02/03
Posts: 16437
Loc: Ben Lomond, California
With all the chaos and looting going on in London, it's refreshing to read about people who are thinking twice before joining in.

Did you hear about the dwarf who was about to loot a butcher store, but reconsidered because the steaks were too high?
_________________________
I can explain it to you but I can't understand it for you.

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#352887 - 08/09/11 04:33 PM Re: OT: Jokes [Re: pmbuko]
medic8r Offline
axiomite

Registered: 02/05/06
Posts: 6469
Loc: Fredericksburg, Virginia
I wonder if he makes top shelf cocktails at home.
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