I get a lot of mail order catalogs with weird offerings. (Yeah, I know. You're shocked.) One for medical and science novelties I just got contains this offer for an alarm clock.

Picture a typical 6 x 4 x 4" clock, but with wheels mounted on either side of the face--looking like Princess Leah.

"Tired of too many mornings of hitting the snooze button? Now you have CLOCKY daring you to hit the snooze button. When this mischeivous alaram clock sounds and you decide to snooze, it runs away to hide. This clever little clock forces you to rise from bed and chase it around the room until you find it. Clocky allows you to set the snooze time from 0-9 minutes. When the time expires, it will jump up three feet, sound an alarm, and scurry across the floor. You have the option to disable its wheels, but what's the fun in that?"

Thoughts? Anyone?

Or you could just put the alarm clock on the other side of the room so you have to get out of bed to turn it off.

Apparently, the novelty company feels there's not enough "fun" in your method, I guess.

Here's a link to the product.

http://www.nandahome.com/products/chrome/index.php?color=chrome

I would not like that thing. At all.

My mornings have been great ever since I started using my iPhone + Axiom Audiobytes as my alarm. I set the iPhone to start playing music 30 minutes before I want to get up, and then set a second alarm to beep at my desired wake up time. Works like a charm.

We use the dog.

I'm glad I still have my context on.

But thanks, Peter for posting the actual pic.

You've trained him to lean up against you at the right time?

Chortle, chorlte. No, actually he sings. The song has only 3 notes, each 1/4 tone apart---sort of like a sitar drone. Usually, we're up before the lyrics kick in.

I actually got to get up with my alarm for the first time today in I don't know how many weeks. Well, ignoring the fact I got up at 12:30, 2:00, 4:30, 6...

It's OK, Ken. One of them will be getting up for YOU all night long when you're in late senile dementia AND incontinent.

After weeks of being up every two hours, I finally got him a "bathroom" buzzer. BIG mistake.

Eventually, I bought a video monitor. It took weeks before I had the time to set it up. First night with it, I still kept waking every two hours to look at it on the nightstand.

I couldn't believe I got through a whole night without him being restless or buzzing me. "This monitor is GREAT," I thought. I got up at 6 a.m. and went into his room to check on him. Ohhh, no wonder the buzzer never went off! No wonder he never moved! Jeesh! And all this time I thought it was just a pathetic attempt to get attention. My bad.

I remember hearing about Clocky some years ago. Seems like it was a student project at MIT or something. I've often entertained the idea of buying something like that for my daughter. She is 16 and is apparently incapable of removing herself from her bed. Seriously.

I'm considering The Sensory Assault Alarm Clock, but I think I might have to rig up some bass shakers and just use it as a switch or something. And - honestly - I don't think it's loud enough.

That's why I'm taken with the Screaming Meanie which goes to 120db and requires a three-button press for final shutoff.

Christmas is going to be special this year.

Tom, if you get her that, she will, someday, put you in one of those homes you see on 20/20.

Tom, have you considered (or tried) direct current.
They do a lot of work with that, too, at MIT.

Direct Current---It works, bitches!

They gonna try to do that to you anyway, so GO FOR IT!

Yes, some days, I need to be the one who amuses me.

The alternative seems to be her mother or I pulling her out of her bed until one of us busts a hip or something.

I don't think she wants to go away to college because of this. I'm really starting to get worried.

I think this all has great potential for some kind of Rube Goldberg, groupthink constructofest.

I'm not good with relays and stuff, but might be willing to learn. It seems like it would be cathartic to drop something on her - like icewater or ping-pong balls. But, then, how do you reload it and clean up the mess?

I kind of like the bass-shaker idea, but I don't know that it would really work.

Perhaps some kind of pneumatic lift on one side of the bed.

Hmmmm.

All right, then. If you don't like the Direct Current idea, how's 'bout a/c. She has an outlet in her room, right?

As a teen I once ended the Xmas tree lights with an outlet instead of a plug, so I went and made a two-sided plug. It woulda been OK, had I thought to plug it into the tree lights, THEN into the wall.

Threw me across the room up against the sofa.

You're welcome. Happy to help.

I thinking a modified, lower-voltage ceiling-mounted taser might work.

I've heard frozen marbles work wonders. Drop them in the bed, and they always roll towards the dip in the bed your body creates.

Awesome idea! Though I'm sure that anything small and spherical that you put in the freezer for 15 minutes would also work.

Me thinking that also.

But, a taser makes people NOT move, right?

Nice call on the marbles, Dan.

Ken, I don't read every post, and might have missed an announcement, so I'll ask again: has there been a recent addition to your family who's getting you up?

Ken, will you answer the poor man, already?

John's a scary man.

John needs an avatar.

This might be appropriate:

But yes, we have another baby now. Born about a month ago.

Congrats on the new addition to the family. I guessed you hadn't resurrected your other kids baby pics for the avatar but didn't want to push my luck.

No Illuminati or Freemasons allowed on this forum!

But, but..., they're Jesus and Mary Magdalene's kids!!! Couldn't they, like, smite us, or something?

:packs up and leaves:

HMMMM? I'm sure they think they can. Or get a pet owl to attack us .

Tom - Squirt gun. They work wonderfully, while being fun to boot. The sheets must be stripped off first though for this tactic to be most effective.

Very good, Ken; congratulations to you and Jen! If this was mentioned before, I missed it, but I suppose that I should be on the alert for this every year or so now?

As to the suggested avatar, yes the Eye of God(no conspiratorial nonsense about Freemason or "New World Order" context in the Great Seal of the U.S.)does read all the posts here, but there's no cause for concern unless a hint of dissatisfaction(e.g., a lightning strike destroying the equipment)has been delivered.

Conspiracy nonsense, John? Oh yes, don't say anything about the secret society and discredit all as blasphemy. Typical Freemason et.al rhetoric....... he's exposed .

The aforementioned do have their "hand in" more than people know (or care to)... no conspiracy theory (which should be an antiquated term because it serves to discredit any validity that an alternative theory has; it's just slander), but rather fact. That which threatens the power structure is often a hard pill to swallow.

I have family members that are Freemasons, and was told by my mother, quite succinctly, to never bring it up in front of them; it's hard .