For speed, you're out of luck. You can't upgrade the processor on most laptops since they are soldered to the board -- unlike desktops which have convenient sockets.

As far as RAM goes, 256mb is barely enough (as you've surmised), but is easy to upgrade. I'd definitely recommend doing it yourself.

Is the laoptop model number 3150P? You can upgrade your laptop to 512 mb. Here's a link to the proper chip.