Axiom Home Page Forums General Discussion The Water Cooler 50 worst music acts of all time

Blender Magazine recently named what they consider to be the 50 worst music acts of all time. If list isn't the biggest piece of chit I have ever seen. Sure there are alot that belong on there. But The Doors?? ELP?? Creed?? Asia?? Yngwie Malmsteen?? Manowar?? Iron Butterfly?? Among others sure don't belong on there.

Here is their list for what it's worth.

1. Insane Clown Posse
2. Emerson, Lake and Palmer
3. Michael Bolton
4. Kenny G
5. Starship
6. Kansas
7. Asia
8. Vanilla Ice
9. Lee Greenwood
10. Air Supply
11. Latoya Jackson
12. Tin Machine
13. Mick Jagger
14. Yngwie Malmsteen
15. Yanni
16. Oingo Boingo
17. Benzino
18. Pat Boone
19. Dan Fogelberg
20. Howard Jones
21. The Alan Parsons Project
22. Primus
23. Creed
24. Bad English
25. Jamiroquai
26. Celine Dion
27. Colour Me Bad
28. Crash Test Dummies
29. Skinny Puppy
30. Richard Marx
31. Arrested Development
32. The Hooters
33. Japan
34. Live
35. Paul Oakenfold
36. 98 Degrees
37. The Doors
38. Nelson
39. Bob Geldof
40. Blind Melon
41. Whitesnake
42. Rick Wakeman
43. Mike and the Mechanics
44. Manowar
45. Gipsy Kings
46. The Spin Doctors
47. Goo Goo Dolls
48. Master P
49. Toad the Wet Sprocket
50. Iron Butterfly

There are 9 in that list that I completely disagree with. Which ones? I ain't tellin'.

i think that same magazine did a '50 worst songs' of all time.. i saw it on 'cold pizza' on espn2 the other morning. its not like these are done on a survey or anything.. its a bunch of underachievers, sitting around eatin stale doritos, playin their 20th season of madden football on play station, and sucking in more bong water than smoke. one says, "hey, that vanilla ice sure sucks".. and off they go. i get this visual of these idiots starting with a good idea, then ending up at the local starbucks the next morning, trying to drink enough latte to stay awake and finish this stupid list, that seemed like a great idea 6 hours earlier..

i dont need blender, or any magazine, to tell me what is good or bad music.. i am intelligent enough to make my own decision as to what i like. thanks, but no thanks..

did i wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning, or what??

BTW- monstermile- i have been listening to some classic maiden as of late.. beast, killers, live after death, powerslave... lovin' it..

bigjohn

You go bigjohn, you go.

How Starship didn't get number 1 is beyond me.

Man, there's a bunch that don't belong on there. Are they talking about live shows, albums, songs, the group in general, what? If they didn't have 98 degrees on there, I'd say they're just a bunch of Top 40 pop-loving trolls, but... I'm surprised they didn't put the Beatles on there because they're "hard to understand!"

And they missed Korn and Limp Bizkit.

John, you are one of the most eloquent crackers I've ever had the pleasure to run into. You're a joy. Outspoken (which I happen to appreciate), but a joy.

One of the great things about getting older is that you come to the realization that "good" and "bad" need have nothing whatsoever to do with "like" and "dislike."

Using films as an example, the generally accepted "best" movie ever made is Citizen Kane. I won't dispute the "best" label, but I've never liked the movie. It just never has reached into me and touched something in my head or heart, and moved me. And, (here's the good part) it doesn't bother me, in the least that I don't like it, nor does it bother me if others DO. I no longer need to justify my "likes" and "dislikes" by the generally accepted "goods" and "bads." Truly liberating.

There are a number of artists on that list that I don't believe belong there (though I'm not sure if the list is criticizing their music, or only their live performances). In all probability, many of you would think they DO belong there. It doesn't matter.

I've been a musician all my life. And, the only thing that matters about music, is that YOU enjoy it. "Good; "bad;" irrelevant. It is my fervent hope, that whatever type(s) of music you listen to, you listen because it stimulates your mind, touches your heart, lifts your soul, and makes life a little sweeter. The single greatest reward of being a musician (even a relatively unsuccessful one like me), is the knowledge that you've spent your life doing something that gives pleasure without doing any harm.

So you NEVER need to justify your musical likes and dislikes to anyone.................except yourself.

OH GAD! I apologize for this philosophical diatribe. Chalk it up to no breakfast yet, hence low blood sugar. I'll go eat now.

I'm just curious...does anyone here subscribe to Blender? Is there good content in the magazine? Where do they come up with this stuff? I can look at a list of say, the 50 hottest women in Hollywood and it makes sense. They (for the most part) choose people with universal appeal. This list seems well beyond arbitrary... I would be upset that I had paid for this if I were a subscriber, it's neither informative nor amusing. They could probably have made it a list of 25 acts and made it have some universal acceptance. If it were funny at least, that would be something but it's just a waste of time, paper, and ink that has the indecency of appearing to come from some authority.

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BTW- monstermile- i have been listening to some classic maiden as of late.. beast, killers, live after death, powerslave... lovin' it..

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I can listen to Powerslave over and over again and never get tired of it. Same with their first. All of the years I have been into Maiden (21) I still have never liked Killers though.

ringmir-

good job of making my point better than i could.. you are exactly right. its not funny, its not informative, its just a big flashy headline thay can splash on the cover so it looks good on the rack. and the authority you mentioned, HA.. couldnt agree with you more.. like their list is somehow 'official' cause its in blender magazine. its just their opinion, no better or worse than mine.. unfortunitely, i dont publish a magazine, so i guess my opinion dont count.. (yeah right)..

but what cracks me up, is that, sure as we are here saying how 'ridiculious' the list is.. somewhere else, a group of people are arguing about how 'correct' the list is.. different strokes for different folks..

I WANT TO PUBLISH MY OWN MAGAZINE..i will call it, 'MUSIC, GUNS, AND CHICKS'.. who wants the first copy.

monster- i pretty much dig it all, up til that block in the 90's when they replaced bruce.. at least he is back touring with them now, or he was last i heard? i think i am gonna go on an 80's trip for a while.. Dio, Dokken, Scorpions, Crue, and Ratt.. oh the memories..

bigjohn

Blender is actually a great mag. In my opinion it's the best 'widely-available' music magazine and while I don't always agree with everything they write (in fact I disagree with a couple on the list) I've found the magazine invaluable for leads on new bands. The Libertines are a great example, I never would have checked them out if not for the great review they got in Blender. I think it's well written and very humorous. I'd urge anyone to pick up a copy of it and read through (especially readers of Maxim mag).

By the way I am not a subscriber, but may as well be - I've been buying the mag since issue 1.

bigjohn: Yup Bruce is back with them. I saw them last summer with Dio and Motorhead. 8 rows from the stage. First time i had seen them since the early 90's.

Fair enough, I will consider this list business to be filler for an otherwise good magazine. As I don't read it I really have no idea, but I definately believe a good magazine can have periodically bad articles.

they always throw lists in there, some are more humorous than useful. Last month they had the 50 craziest musicians ever (gold star to the first person to guess who was #1). They've had plenty of useful ones though, like the top American cds of all time, the top albums of the year, etc. They are always the first to admit that the list is just their opinions and they are pretty good a printing the flak they get from readers over inclusion/omission of certain names.

could it be sid himself?? i figure johnny rotten, ozzy, alice cooper, and jim morrison had to have made the list also??

bigjohn

My vote goes to Michael Jackson. I could name a whole slew that deserve to be on that list though.

If it wasn't for the rest of the band Sid should have made it. The guy didn't have a clue how to play his instrument and they brought in session bassist to take over for him when they recorded Nevermind the Bollocks. Ahhh, but he wasn't about the music.

Oh John Simon Richie. How did you ever come to be named after a hamster...

I've seen this list before on another forum and I just cringe when I read through the list. I agree with John and no "pop culture" magazine has even a micrometer worth of musical credibility to say what they think is "the worst music". For example, in the 90's Les Claypool (from Primus) was hailed by MTV (when they actually cared about music) as one of the best bassists in the world. So how does that make them one of the "worst". I can actually agree with most of those on the list but as a die hard prog rock fan, I get sickly offended to see some of the most talented musicians bashed by these "music" critics. I really wonder what they feel is the "best 50". Oh and if you guys think this list is bad, find the "Top 100 guitarists" list (i can't remember which guitar magazine wrote it). It's another list that makes you wonder what the "critics" are thinking. [/rant made]

I am operating under the assumption that this particular list was directed at live performances. Regardless though I still agree that Primus for one has no place on here.

Speaking of Primus...it's great to know that they're back to their original lineup. HERB IS BACK!!! (Tim Alexander)

"Herb the ginseng drummer" is back? that is indeed good news...

Hmm... I'd only stroke 4 bands off the list, and I could understand why at least one is on there.

Skinny Puppy - okay, not everyone is a fan of heavy industrial, doesn't help the way Nivek Ogre looked back then either - like a slightly more muscular "Azriel Abyss" (from SNL's Goth Talk)

But I'm a fan of Live, and Bob Geldof and I respect the Doors (though after hearing Riders on the Storm for the millionth time on the radio, I'd have a bone to pick as well... but that should put George Thoroughgood on the list as well - anyone else's rock station play "One Bourbon..." 18 times a day?)

Hmm... does bring up the idea of putting Pat Boone and David Coverdale in a room together - last man standing lives.

You may disagree with their picks, but I'd never heard about Blender until now.

Bren R.

LOL. I never heard of Blender before either Brent. I saw this list in another forum.

Fabulous post, Jack. Just fabulous. You expressed my feelings exactly. There are lots of "good" movies or good pieces of music that I don't "enjoy". On a good day, I can recognize their technical merit, complexity and maybe even a hint of the artist's vision. But it is entirely possible that the artist is trying to reach me either in a way that I do not wish to be reached, or in a way that does not resonate with my life experience.

Another example is that many people are enthralled by reality TV or crime/medical shows. Those kinds of shows just make me feel grumpy or sad, so I choose to spend my leisure time on other things that make me feel happy. Now, I grant that ER is a "good" television show, but I don't care to watch that level of seriousness or that kind of content right before I go to bed.

And, most importantly, the diversity of our experiences and our interests is what makes this such a wonderful world.

"I don't believe that life is supposed to make you feel good, or to make you feel miserable either. Life is just supposed to make you feel." - Gloria Naylor

Thank you, Tom.

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Now, I grant that ER is a "good" television show, but I don't care to watch that level of seriousness or that kind of content right before I go to bed.

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Do what I do - since it's on here at 9:00pm, don't got to bed until 3:30am - lots of time to clear your head between!

Bren R.

Whitesnake is on the list?! OH HECK NO!!!!!!!!!

This article came up again today... realized they had missed quite a few bands that should not go unmentioned:

Chris deBurgh
Robert Plant
Robert Palmer
Jim Croce
Boney M
Gowan/Glass Tiger/Frozen Ghost (any Canadian 80s bubblegum pop)
Art of Noise
Led Zepplin
Lynerd... Lynndre... Linnerd... Skynnnerd...Skinnerd... any southern fried rock
Yes
Boston
Chicago
Styx
the Mentors
G.G. Allin

Bren R.

Lez Zeppelin??? Thou hast blasphemed!

And you can't possibly hate the band that wrote Freebird...

!!@@#!@*&!!@

Boston? Zeppelin?? Skynrd??? Tell me you're joking!!

BTW...I used to never have much use for Skynrd until I had to cover some of their song...back when I had time for a band. I know a little..and That smell...are great tunes!!!!

The fact that Led Zeppelin was on there made me think you were kidding, or possibly just listing more bands that would have made it onto their list, using their "logic". Of course I could be wrong and maybe you truly feel they should be on there...in which case I concur with the blasphemy comment.

there's also some more obscure skynyrd that's much better than the radio rotations - Four Walls of Raiford, Am I Losing?, Swamp Music...

By tossing all the Southern Rock out, you lose the Allman Brothers Band, the Atlanta Rhythm Section, Little Feat, the Black Crowes...Hell, even ELVIS - pretty much the beginning of southern rock; that marriage of gospel, the blues, jazz, a little mountain music...

^billy
what can I say, I lean toward the blues and folk...

Well, now if THAT didn't revive a thread!

Bren R.

When you listed Led Zepplin, Yes, and Skynard - well, I figured you were about to go down in Flames (pun intended).

Sean

I have to reply as well. For Zeppelin to be on there is truly blasphemous.

I stand corrected - it IS spelled Zeppelin, at least they spelled that word right.

I was once asked by a co-worker how I could like any kind of rock music but have no appreciation for the blues and the original rock bands that it grew out of. I suggested that I liked corn, but I certainly didn't like what THAT grew out of.

Music is definately in the ear of the beholder and for the Zep fans - more power to you (can someone tell me what the Zoso means?) but it's not my cup of tea as I'm sure the likes of Anti-Flag, NOFX, Bad Religion, Pennywise, Ministry, the No WTO Combo and D.O.A. aren't most peoples' taste.

Bren R.

Pennywise and Bad Religion I most definitely like, but they're still no Zeppelin. But I guess it is in the ear of the beholder, but either way its still blasphemy...

As we all know...

"Enjoy the Music. Trust your ears. Laugh at Folks Who Claim to Know it All."

Speaking of worst musical acts ever... I missed the shining epitome of the award...

Toby Keith - how this guy isn't arrested for uttering threats or hate propaganda, I don't know.

Meanwhile, the Fat Wreck Rock Against Bush compilation is being removed from store shelves due to threats of violence against store owners and employees by supporters of the GOP.

Bren R.

Two words:

Oakridge Boys


^billy
still scared from this parental induced nightmare

Zoso doesn't mean anything. It's not even a word. It was just a symbol that happened to look vry much like the word "Zoso."

billy-

in the 6th grade, we did a school skit to the song 'ELVIRA'.. i still cringe to this day when i hear that song.. especially the deep, baritone voice guy.. scary

bigjohn

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Art of Noise

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hmmm, that just pisses me off... I know its been said but, that list is just wrong!

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ART OF NOISE
hmmm, that just pisses me off... I know its been said but, that list is just wrong!

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I know Inane - I had a hard time adding that - they do deserve it, as well as They Might Be Giants and Dead Milkmen - all of whom I own CDs by, but, you can't pick favorites.

I am, though, starting to wonder if I've genuinely offended anyone? No one is that much a fan of a band that they're offended that not everyone sees the draw, are they?

If so, please feel free to have fun at my expense at any of the following in my collection :
Dayglo Abortions - 2 CDs I'd rather not post the names of (to avoid further offending anyone)
Dead Milkmen - Bucky Fellini & Not Richard But Dick
Chantal Kreviazuk - Under these Rocks and Stones
Lummox - Natural Born Swillers
Meatloaf - BOOH and BOOH2:BIH
Alanis Morrisette - Jagged Little Pill
The Smiths - Meat is Murder
Suicidal Tendencies - Prime Cuts
TMBG - Flood
Twisted Sister - Big Hits and Nasty Cuts

Bren R.

Meatloaf?!?! My own words cannot capture how I feel about that, so I'll leave you with this movie quote:

"HAAA ha ha ha ha ha ha! HA HA ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha HA HA HA! ... [ slumps over dead]"

Man, do I need a life.

Preceeded by the quote "Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!!" [Wallace Shawn - The Princess Bride]

I didn't see Marilyn Manson on the list

Sean

inconceivable!

"I didn't mean to jog him so hard." -- Andre the Giant as Fezzick

"You killed my father...prepare to die..." -- Mandy Patinkin as Inigo Montoya.

WhatFurrer

"Mawwaige... Mawwaige is what bwings us togetha, today. Wuv, twue wuv..." -- Peter Cook, as The Impressive Clergyman

Also, my mother when presiding over a wedding rehearsal a month or two ago...

"OK, we'd better stop now lest we quote the whole damn movie." -- Peter as Party Pooper

"Anybody want a peanut?" - Andre the Giant as Fezzik.

You extrapolated.

Hello, my name is .... I thought my wife and I were the only ones able to recite the whole movie. Its a classic. Love the Intellivision baseball at the begining.

I have one question about the DVD it claims to be in 5.1 yet I am unable to have it register as such. I have triple checked DVD player and the receiver for PCM output and they are both set for DB or DTS in auto modes. Any one else have this problem? or did I just get a bad disc.

Threw the DVD on and it came up in Dolby Digital 5.1

Sean

Alright, don't look now, here's Blender's newest article up for debate, The 50 Worst Songs Ever:

50. Celine Dion - My Heart Will Go On
49. Right Said Fred - I'm Too Sexy
48. The Beatles - Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da
47. Bryan Adams - The Only Thing That Looks Good on Me is You
46. New Kids on the Block - Hangin' Tough
45. Ja Rule Feat. Ashanti - Mesmerize
44. Meat Loaf - I'd Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That)
43. Uncle Kracker - Follow Me
42. Simon & Garfunkel - The Sounds of Silence
41. Billy Joel - We Didn't Start the Fire
40. Color Me Badd - I Wanna Sex You Up
39. Ricky Martin - She Bangs
38. Rednex - Cotton Eye Joe
37. Gerardo - Rico Suave
36. Master P Feat. Silkk, Fiend, Mia-X and Mystikal - Make Em Say Uhh!
35. R.E.M. - Shiny Happy People
34. Dan Fogelberg - Longer
33. Aqua - Barbie Girl
32. Will Smith - Will 2K
31. Crash Test Dummies - MMM MMM MMM MMM
30. Whitney Houston - Greatest Love of All
29. Deep Blue Something - Breakfast at Tiffany's
28. John Mayer - Your Body is a Wonderland
27. Europe - The Final Countdown
26. The Doors - The End
25. Puff Daddy Feat. Faith Evans and 112 - I'll Be Missing You
24. Five For Fighting - Superman
23. Corey Hart - Sunglasses at Night
22. Toby Keith - Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue (The Angry American)
21. Spin Doctors - Two Princes
20. Lionel Richie - Dancing on the Ceiling
19. Mr. Mister - Broken Wings
18. Chicago - You're the Inspiration
17. Hammer - Pumps and a Bump
16. 4 Non Blondes - What's Up?
15. The Rembrandts - I'll Be There for You
14. Bette Midler - From a Distance
13. Genesis - Illegal Alien
12. The Beach Boys - Kokomo
11. Clay Aiken - Invisible
10. Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder - Ebony and Ivory
9. Madonna - American Life
8. Eddie Murphy - Party All the Time
7. Bobby McFerrin - Don't Worry Be Happy
6. Huey Lewis and the News - The Heart of Rock & Roll
5. Vanilla Ice - Ice Ice Baby
4. Limpbizkit - Rollin'
3. Wang Chung - Everbody Have Fun Tonight
2. Billy Ray Cyrus - Achy Breaky Heart
1. Starship - We Built This City

Yeah there's a special on VH1 where they're counting down the "top fifty most awesomely bad songs ever." It's pretty much that same list but interestingly the order is different on a bunch of them.

I agree with at least 90% of those. My disagreements:

There are worse Beatles songs than Ob-la-di.

Crash Test Dummies is a guilty pleasure of mine. How many other bands have a bass/baritone as the lead singer? It's easier for me to sing along, since my range is the same.

I just wonder if their definition of 'worst' equals over exposure to... Most of those songs were amazingly over played on the radio and in clubs. Though I agree that many of them when heard today induce (in me) an instant catatonic state often mistaken for a coma or precurser to a grand mal seizure to avoid actually hearing them...

jr

How are they gonna have John Mayer on the list? Either way, "your body is a wonderland" makes the chicks wet...

I'm with Peter, but I have to include Sounds of Silenct. WTF?!

Yes, overplayed. Still a good song.

Toby Keith, agreed. My son worked with the set up crew for a concert of his in Fargo. He said he was a complete jerk, but so was Axl Rose.

That song makes the chicks wet? More like it tries really hard to be a song that moistens a woman. He's got nothing on Marvin.

But what do I know. I'm married.

What, no Flying Lizard?


Semper Fi

I basically dislike most modern alleged music. I just don't consider the stuff on MTV music, at all. Linkin Park, for an example, makes me absolutely cringe.

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Toby Keith, agreed. My son worked with the set up crew for a concert of his in Fargo. He said he was a complete jerk, but so was Axl Rose.

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Umm.. I'm more concerned about the hate message... guy makes Skrewdriver and Johnny Reb look like members of the Rainbow Coalition.

Bren R.

If I hear Hotel California one more time...

When I was in high school, some friends and I were making a video for a project in German class. We used Hotel California for the soundtrack. It was on repeat in the background. We were horrible actors and had to do countless takes. By the time we were done, I could frickin' smell the colitas rising up through the air a little too clearly. Needless to say, I could not listen to that song for a number of years without my brain checking out (but never leaving) for a while.

For German class?

Heissen Sie willkommen zum Hotel Kalifornien?

Bren R.

Ach, bitte!! Deine schlechte Deutsch brennt meine Augen!

MEINE AUGEN, MEINE AUGEN!!

OK now.. dont make me start bustin out some tex-mex street spanish!!

i took french in high school, dont remember a thing. well, i remember a little, just enough to sound stupid. but i guess thats normal for me.

bigjohn

AH! Jean! Je parle francais aussi. Un peu. Combien fenetre avez vous dans sa classe? Paris est situe sur la Seine. La Seine traverse paris.

ahhh, francais, je suis un ananas!

You're a pineapple?

Mais oui!