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#348367 - 05/17/11 09:46 AM
May is National Masturbation Month
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axiomite
Registered: 02/05/06
Posts: 5999
Loc: Fredericksburg, Virginia
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Don't just stand there, get out and celebrate National Masturbation Month. Link is pretty much safe for work. In related news, a Brazilian judge has ruled that a 36-year-old female accountant can legally masturbate at work and watch porn on her work computer. I now have a new hero.
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"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - Mahatma Gandhi
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#348375 - 05/17/11 10:28 AM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: medic8r]
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connoisseur
Registered: 03/23/10
Posts: 2762
Loc: Brockton Heights, MA
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In related news, a Brazilian judge has ruled that a 36-year-old female accountant can legally masturbate at work and watch porn on her work computer. I now have a new hero. Yes, but the law only allows for the same porn SHE's watching! Now I have a new hero!
Edited by GOD (05/17/11 10:28 AM)
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Harbor Freight: Where it's always hard to put a price on worthless.
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#348376 - 05/17/11 10:28 AM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: PopeBobThe53rd]
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axiomite
Registered: 03/07/05
Posts: 7286
Loc: Glendale, Arizona
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It's hard to celebrate and type at the same time. . .
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"Nothin' up my sleeve. . ." --Bullwinkle J. Moose
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#348377 - 05/17/11 10:29 AM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: medic8r]
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shareholder in the making
Registered: 09/27/04
Posts: 10250
Loc: 543 miles North of VAST
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What if I can only masturbate to audiophile zombies?
Anyone ever wonder why I hang out here?
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::::::: “Yum. I'd love to gnaw on those with my ears." :::::::
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#348378 - 05/17/11 10:30 AM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: MarkSJohnson]
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axiomite
Registered: 02/05/06
Posts: 5999
Loc: Fredericksburg, Virginia
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I have often REFLECTed on that.
_________________________
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - Mahatma Gandhi
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#348379 - 05/17/11 10:32 AM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: medic8r]
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connoisseur
Registered: 03/23/10
Posts: 2762
Loc: Brockton Heights, MA
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That's the pinkest home page I've ever seen! Ew. Oh, and your avatar makes me think of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, which makes me think of Hunter Thompson, which makes me think of how old I am. And you say you chose your profession to fulfill your need to help others?
_________________________
Harbor Freight: Where it's always hard to put a price on worthless.
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#348390 - 05/17/11 11:02 AM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: medic8r]
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connoisseur
Registered: 03/23/10
Posts: 2762
Loc: Brockton Heights, MA
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ESAD!
Edited by GOD (05/17/11 11:02 AM)
_________________________
Harbor Freight: Where it's always hard to put a price on worthless.
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#348395 - 05/17/11 11:29 AM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: PopeBobThe53rd]
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axiomite
Registered: 02/05/06
Posts: 5999
Loc: Fredericksburg, Virginia
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What, do I look German? I'm not into that genre ...
_________________________
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - Mahatma Gandhi
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#348399 - 05/17/11 11:36 AM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: medic8r]
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axiomite
Registered: 12/27/08
Posts: 6417
Loc: It's all about the location.
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You don't like to pump youself up?
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A person convinced against their will is of the same opinion still.
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#348405 - 05/17/11 12:12 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: Adrian]
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connoisseur
Registered: 06/23/07
Posts: 3923
Loc: The Papal Apartments
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Can you guys pool your money together to get me a hooker so I can celebrate, too?
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Goodnight oracle Bob. Here's your bedtime glass of warm milk with Viagra and OxyContin.
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#348417 - 05/17/11 12:54 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: medic8r]
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aficionado
Registered: 05/01/02
Posts: 842
Loc: Davenport, Iowa, USA
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Female porcupines have been witnessed using wooden sticks to masturbate. Ouch!!! 
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#348421 - 05/17/11 01:20 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: sonicfox]
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axiomite
Registered: 12/27/08
Posts: 6417
Loc: It's all about the location.
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That sounds very knotty.
_________________________
A person convinced against their will is of the same opinion still.
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#348425 - 05/17/11 01:49 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: Adrian]
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axiomite
Registered: 02/05/06
Posts: 5999
Loc: Fredericksburg, Virginia
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Gotta love a woman who knows what to do with a piece of hard wood.
_________________________
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - Mahatma Gandhi
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#348426 - 05/17/11 01:51 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: Adrian]
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axiomite
Registered: 10/05/06
Posts: 6202
Loc: PEI, Canada
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Edit: Should have quoted Adrian. JP sniped me. Although this Booo goes out to you too. Must I "Boooo" you again, Adrian? Enough with the PUNishment. 
Edited by Murph (05/17/11 01:53 PM)
_________________________
I'm Riffing. People usually stop me when I'm riffing. Or carry on without me. That's also an option.
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#348429 - 05/17/11 02:19 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: Murph]
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axiomite
Registered: 02/05/06
Posts: 5999
Loc: Fredericksburg, Virginia
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Adrian = Attila, King of the Puns.
_________________________
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - Mahatma Gandhi
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#348440 - 05/17/11 04:56 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: medic8r]
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axiomite
Registered: 02/05/06
Posts: 5999
Loc: Fredericksburg, Virginia
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May is also:
•Asian Heritage Month (Canada)
•Asian/Pacific American Heritage Month
•Awareness of Medical Orphans Month
•Better Hearing and Speech Month
•Better Sleep Month
•Borderline Personality Disorder Month
•Brain Tumor Awareness Month
•Correct Posture Month
•Creative Beginnings Month
•Family Wellness Month
•Fibromyalgia Education and Awareness Month
•Foot Health Month
•Freedom Shrine Month
•Get Caught Reading Month
•Gifts From The Garden Month
•Go Fetch! Food Drive for Homeless Animals Month
•Haitian Heritage Month
•Heal the Children Month
•Healthy Vision Month
•Huntington's Disease Awareness Month
•International Audit Month
•International Business Image Improvement Month
•International Victorious Woman Month
•Jewish-American Heritage Month
•Latino Books Month
•Lyme Disease Awareness Month National (World)
•Meditation Month
•Motorcycle Safety Month
•National Allergy/Asthma Awareness Month
•National Arthritis Month
•National Artisan Gelato Month
•National Asparagus Month
•National Barbeque Month
•National Bike Month
•National Chocolate Custard Month
•National Egg Month
•National Family Month
•National Foster Care Month National Good Car Keeping Month
•National Good Car Keeping Month
•National Hamburger Month
•National Hepatitis Awareness Month
•National High Blood Pressure Month
•National Macaroon Day
•National Mental Health Month
•National Military Appreciation Month National
•National Moving Month
•National Mine Month
•National Osteoporosis Prevention Month
•National Photo Month
•National Physical Fitness and Sports Month
•National Physiotherapy Month
•National Preservation Month
•National Revise Your Work Schedule Month
•National Salad Month
•National Salsa Month
•National Share A Story month
•National Smile Month (From May 18 to June 17)
•National Strawberry Month
•National Stroke Awareness Month
•National Vinegar Month
•Older Americans Month
•Personal History Month
•React Month
•Strike Out Strokes Month
•Sweet Vidalia Onions Month
•Teen Self-Esteem Month
•Tennis Month
•Ultra-violet Awareness Month
•Women's Health Care Month
•Young Achievers of Tomorrow Month
_________________________
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - Mahatma Gandhi
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#348443 - 05/17/11 05:32 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: medic8r]
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connoisseur
Registered: 12/16/05
Posts: 1467
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I'm just glad I work from home...
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#348445 - 05/17/11 05:44 PM
Re: May is National Masturbation Month
[Re: danmagicman7]
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connoisseur
Registered: 06/23/07
Posts: 3923
Loc: The Papal Apartments
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I'm just glad I work from home... I'm glad I'm not the one picking up your mail .
_________________________
Goodnight oracle Bob. Here's your bedtime glass of warm milk with Viagra and OxyContin.
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