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Posted By: BrenR You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 07:36 AM
Hands up everyone that spent 1:00-2:30am getting a racoon off their roof and patching the hole it ate through the roof decking.

Just me?

Odd.

Bren R.
Posted By: richeydog Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 07:58 AM
No, can't say that I have...There are no racoons around these parts.

Only reason I'm still awake cause I had to see the end of the Canucks/Stars overtime fest.
Posted By: pmbuko Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 12:04 PM
I'd blame the ****ing contractor who left traces of his tuna sandwich under there.
Posted By: medic8r Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 12:05 PM
Wow, times must be tough for those northern critters ... can't say that I've heard of one trying to get into the house that way.

I've had to shoo them, and the occasional possum, and the neighbor's cat, away from the cat's food in our garage. Would that I had video of Mrs. medic8r stomping her feet on the driveway and taunting a possum never to come back here again!!!

Then there was the time, when I was 12 or so, that my Mom finally got fed up with opossums raiding our chicken house. One night when she heard the typical ruckus, she grabbed the shotgun and treed one. BLAM!!! She liked to brag that it rained possum for a week.
Posted By: MarkSJohnson Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 12:08 PM
Quote:

Then there was the time, when I was 12 or so, that my Mom finally got fed up with opossums raiding our chicken house. One night when she heard the typical ruckus, she grabbed the shotgun and treed one. BLAM!!! She liked to brag that it rained possum for a week.




And, again.... what profession did you enter?
Posted By: medic8r Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 01:19 PM
Quote:

And, again.... what profession did you enter?




Ha, good one. You are actually on the money, according to Dr. Evans, one of my professors. During a lecture on object relations, she said, "Men go into psychiatry to figure out their mothers."

"That's what Dr. Misch said!" I exclaimed, as our training director indeed did like to talk about his crazy mother and how he finally understood her after all these years of training.

"You're projecting," said the wise Dr. Evans.

That has stuck with me. I think I've got Mom pegged now. And my mother-in-law. Still working on the wife and, oh, the self.
Posted By: Stymie Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 01:20 PM
I feel your pain. I had a family of squirrels in my attic and of course the hole they created to get in was on the outer most corner of highest part of my roof. Once I was sure they were out and about during the day, I climbed up and filled their hole/entrance with expanding foam. (The kind used to fill gaps around water spigots.) It took two cans and some patience, but I got it closed up. That evening, I had some very confused and unhappy squirrels running around on my roof. After a few days of trying to eat through the foam, they gave up.
Posted By: Wid Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 01:21 PM
Quote:

Then there was the time, when I was 12 or so, that my Mom finally got fed up with opossums raiding our chicken house. One night when she heard the typical ruckus, she grabbed the shotgun and treed one. BLAM!!! She liked to brag that it rained possum for a week.






I hope ya didn't waste it, that's some good eatin
Posted By: Murph Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 04:08 PM
W have lots of raccoons and they can get into ANYTHING!!
Houdini has nothing on them. Never heard of them eating through a roof though. The ones around here would be more likely to stick bubblegum in your door lock and walk right in.

I can barely remember a friend of my mothers who had a pet racoon. Walked it around on a leash. Add that into your Analyze your Mom thoughts.

I do remember that I hated it, I was scared of it and it kept steeling my Cheesies.
Posted By: danmagicman7 Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 04:17 PM
I devised an invention called the "edible grenade." So far, it's been foolproof.
Posted By: BrenR Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 04:48 PM
Quote:

Mom finally got fed up with opossums raiding our chicken house. One night when she heard the typical ruckus, she grabbed the shotgun and treed one. BLAM!!!


I did the next best thing in a Canadian urban environment... a pellet gun.

Roofer's coming out tonight to patch the roof.

Unbelievable.

Next time it won't be a .177 pellet at 380fps... I'll choke it to death with my bare hands.

Bren R.
Posted By: LT61 Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 06:56 PM
Me too....a racoon started chewing on the fireplace chimney
on our house in Florida, one afternoon.
I got rid of him with the garden hose,......and a lot of water.

Now that I think about it......I guess I'm lucky he didn't get mad, and jump on my head.
Anyway, a lot of wood filler,and paint later...the house was sold.
It's true...you can't make this stuff up.




How about that... we have at least one thing in common,
Posted By: michael_d Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 07:04 PM
No coons here. I have had to chase moose off my lawn and a brown bear off the porch before though.
Posted By: FordPrefect Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 07:25 PM
Once had to get a bat out of a vent pipe above the stove. Wouldn't recommend it as a way to spend a Saturday afternoon.
Posted By: skyhawk669 Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 08:34 PM
Coons are everywhere here. When I first moved in my current home we had to change the insulation in the attic and we found a bunch of dead ones, and I spent a whole month closing up wholes and adding metal grids all over to prevent them from prying some of the woodboards out. I would gladly shoot them but I think I'd run out of ammo pretty quick...
Posted By: HomeDad Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/12/07 11:15 PM
The racoons eat the cat food on the upper deck, the deer eat my wifes rose bushes, My Akita eats any animal that strays into the dog run, and the big yellow kitty my 5 year old wanted to pet in the driveway was a bobcat.
Posted By: St_PatGuy Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/13/07 01:02 AM
You guys, that's nothing! I live in constant fear of these horrible predators. These shots are from my apartment window:



This one is clearly stalking her next victim.



I'm sorry for this graphic depiction of a feeding frenzy. Poor guy couldn't run fast enough. . .
Posted By: upyourkilt Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/13/07 02:04 AM
I have a roof rat problem my way in Northern California. The more traps I put in the the more of those bastards I catch. I actually found a way to get rid of them in my attic...I replaced the bathtub. You are now saying WTF? The plumber that originally put in the tub cut a huge hole for the tub drain and never patched it. The rats just climbed up the vent line and snuggled into my walls and attic. For our Canadian friends, we don't have basements in Cali, and we have crawl spaces underneath our bottom floors which critters can find many access points that you are not aware of.
Posted By: chesseroo Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/13/07 02:54 AM
Quote:

For our Canadian friends, we don't have basements in Cali, and we have crawl spaces underneath our bottom floors which critters can find many access points that you are not aware of.



Well up here, so far north, we like to dig into the permafrost and hollow out little burrows to keep our beer.
Incidentally, any little holes at the bottom of one's house would allow cold air to come in during the winter and freeze the beer. As such, Canadian builders decided long ago to seal and insulate walls as best as possible so our beers do not freeze...and to keep energy costs reasonable.
I guess that thought concept hasn't hit some California builders yet, though i understand their brownouts are good fun.

Good luck with the rats.
We had some issues with a common grain moth in our pantry for awhile. They kept coming in with the dry goods or produce from the store. The solution was simply cutting off the food supply and zip bagging any grains, seeds or flour.
There's likely some dormant cocoons still in the walls.
Posted By: BrenR Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/13/07 06:28 AM
Well, looks like we're all fixed up... had a buddy who's a roofer stop by after work, between the three of us, we stripped and reshingled, oh about 10% of the roof surface... one entire valley and some capping plus cut out and replaced the damaged decking.

I love when people take so much pride in their job that they do it right... ended up being more than either of us bargained for, but when you're up there saying "well, we're this far... might as well..." then, well... you might as well.

I've got about half a truck bed full of debris to take away tomorrow (he didn't have a garbage trailer), but it's fixed, and fixed right.

Another "wait, wait, wait... do I have one that can top that" story to tell in the future.

Bren R.
Posted By: LightninJoe Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/13/07 08:57 PM
2 things you have to learn for yourself about raccoons:

1) They can get yooooge! Like furry weather balloon huge.

2) They love cat food. Any food really, but they can smell cat food from, well, we are a mile from the nearest water supply/likely habitat.

Bonus: Glancing out the window and seeing a raccon larger than your largest dog (not longer but WAY fatter/rounder)can induce puckering at both ends of the alimentary canal.
Posted By: JohnK Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/14/07 02:36 AM
Shot a couple of 'coons off the roof(possibly making entry plans)in the past few years, using my smallest gun(.32 Beretta). Let the remains, well, remain for a couple days on the ground where they tumbled, as a warning. Not much of a problem.
Posted By: LT61 Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/14/07 02:46 AM
JohnK,

Gulp!......now I REALLY wish I hadn't made fun of your speaker wires.

Larry
Posted By: duckman Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/14/07 03:21 AM
We've had woodchucks on three (3) occasions. The first time was pretty cool.They were in an unused part of the yard and we would watch them from the dining room window, cute little bastards would stick their heads out of these 3-4 ft mounds of dirt.
I looked out there one afternoon and the neighbors german sheperd had one cornered. The little guy had went through the fence but didn't equate the other side of said fence with safety. That woodchuck held off that dog, (those things have some serious claws ) for a long time. I went out there and this woodchuck was panting and wheezing, about to keel over . I try to stay out of animal affairs (kind of a prime directive thing),but I felt so sorry for mr woodchuck that i shooed the dog away. The dog lost interest and wandered off, the woodchuck just collapsed right there. That was it for the woodchucks at that house, they just left- never saw one again. Had to till the area to get rid of the mounds and tunnels.
Posted By: BrenR Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/14/07 06:08 AM
Duckman - do not read, or anyone concerned for the safety of destructive wildlife.

My woodchuck story happened at the farm, one of the guys' brothers-in-law parked his newish Grand Am out there for a month while he went out of province on business. A woodchuck got up inside the hood and ate one of the wiring harnesses, so we repaired it, and just as we were getting done, the dog moseyed over and started barking her head off... we'd missed the fact the woodchuck was still IN the engine compartment. Get out a big steel rod, poke it, it hits the ground, dog scares it... it jumps back up into the engine compartment again... yell at the dog... poke the woodchuck again, again it comes out, sees the dog, jumps back up... after 3 of us looking like complete idiots for 30 minutes repeating this... it gets caught, head between the engine and crossmember... body underneath - head stuck against the engine, this sucker is STUCK.

A few good strong pokes at it... and a few swipes at the body underneath with a shovel... it is NOT budging. We all look at each other with that "alright... now what?"

The sick looks on everyone's faces as I take the keys, start the car up and drive it up and down the gravel road a few times were priceless.

Nearly as good as it'll be some day when a mechanic drops the crossmember and a small animal skull drops on the floor.

Bren R.
Posted By: JohnK Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/14/07 06:29 AM
Larry, as long as you don't go screwing around on my roof you got nothing to worry about.
Posted By: PaulM Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/15/07 06:09 AM
When I was a kid in Toronto my Mom just about having heart failure one day when she walked into the basement sewing room and discovered a racoon sitting there under the table. Boy did she scream. At first we couldn't figure out how it got in there till I noticed sooty foot prints leading from the basement fireplace. We were surprised it came in that way as the chimney was 3 stories in height.

About a year or so later my sisters and I heard scratching in the mainfloor chimney. It sounds like birds or something small. The girls wouldn't go near it so I reach up and open the flew and out drops 3 or 4 baby racoons just born with no fur.

About that time my Dad figured it be best to install some chimney caps.
Posted By: bridgman Re: You can't make this s*** up! - 04/15/07 05:13 PM
>>Let the remains, well, remain for a couple days on the ground where they tumbled, as a warning.

I used to get called in for "bird control" whenever the crows started eating too much from the cherry tree in my mother-in-law's back yard. We found that shooting one, spray-painting it orange, then hanging it in the tree seemed to do a good job of discouraging the other birds.

Before anyone asks, we're talking Toronto suburbs so all pest control was done with an airgun...

... although apparently there was some pest control excitement a few doors down from my old house before I lived there. The old guy at #12 was fighting a losing battle with racoons, so one day he went outside with his shotgun and let off a couple of shots at a racoon on the roof.

Five police cars came, arrested the old guy at gunpoint and confiscated all of his firearms. The neighbors fixed the roof while he was in jail. The racoon got away.
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