I'm going for scenario #4. He really did cut into some live-wires in the wall and as he lay there smoldering, had a vision of Ian with outstretched hands standing over him in a misty fog saying "'tis one of my followers...axiomoholic...I must bring him back...I shall grant you a pair of M80 inwalls if you get your azz up off the floor. Otherwise your wife will kill both of us...."

Half of communication is listening. You can't listen with your mouth.