Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 3,488 Likes: 9
connoisseur
|
connoisseur
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 3,488 Likes: 9 |
That was soooooo funny! Second half of the day already feels better!
See Mojo's signature
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 6,471
axiomite
|
axiomite
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 6,471 |
I had seen those, and I get the feeling that I'm not recognizing half the celebrities in the last one. Good stuff.
Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica.
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 3,301
connoisseur
|
connoisseur
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 3,301 |
OLD people have problems that you haven't even considered yet!
An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow."The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as it was on the previous day.The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, "Well, doc, it's like this - first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezing' it between her knees, but still nothing."The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?"The old man replied, "Yep, but none of us could get the jar open."
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,210
axiomite
|
axiomite
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,210 |
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette, with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit disgusted, grabs the sheet, rolls over, and says, 'Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!'
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 537
aficionado
|
aficionado
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 537 |
A dog is truly a man's best friend. If you don't believe it, just try this experiment.
Put your dog and your wife in the trunk of the car for an hour.
When you open the trunk, see who is really happy to see you
2xM80 VP180 2xQS8 2xM3 HSU STF3 LG 60PS11 Denon 3808 ATI 1506 LCR 2xATI 1502 Oppo BDP-83
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 3,488 Likes: 9
connoisseur
|
connoisseur
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 3,488 Likes: 9 |
See Mojo's signature
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 6,955
axiomite
|
axiomite
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 6,955 |
Opps, I posted the same Dog joke in another thread. Sorry. I hadn't read this one yet.
With great power comes Awesome irresponsibility.
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,210
axiomite
|
axiomite
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 5,210 |
A big Texan stopped at a local restaurant following a day roaming around in Mexico .. While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He asked the waiter, 'What is that you just served?'
The waiter replied, 'Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are called Cojones de Toro, bull's testicles from the bull fight this morning. A delicacy!'
The cowboy said, 'What the heck, bring me an order.'
The waiter replied, 'I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy.'
The next morning, the cowboy returned, placed his order, and that evening was served the one and only special delicacy of the day. After a few bites, inspecting his platter, he called to the waiter and said, 'These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday.'
The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, 'Si,Senor. Sometimes the bull wins.'
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 16,441
shareholder in the making
|
OP
shareholder in the making
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 16,441 |
Did you hear the one about the mute acrobat in a nudist colony who got a W tattooed on each butt cheek?
When he does a cartwheel, he spells out "wow mom wow"
|
|
|
Re: OT: Jokes
|
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 13,840 Likes: 13
shareholder in the making
|
shareholder in the making
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 13,840 Likes: 13 |
aaaaaaaaaaah ha ha ha good one, glad I helped you remember.
M80s VP180 4xM22ow 4xM3ic EP600 2xEP350 AnthemAVM60 Outlaw7700 EmoA500 Epson5040UB FluanceRT85
|
|
|
Forums16
Topics24,945
Posts442,489
Members15,617
|
Most Online2,082 Jan 22nd, 2020
|
|
0 members (),
1,092
guests, and
2
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|