David, I didn't bother to check the post times, but I'm guessing the kitty incident has changed priorities.
Shop around for metal coating places. In any metro area, there should be at least several. You know they're going to get a better result.
If you're going to DYI it, everyone is on the right path so far. "Sand" with plastic steel wool.
It imitates real steel wool; 0=green, 00=maroon, 000=gray, 0000=white. They're about 2 bucks a sheet. I'd get one of each and see just how rough a grit this is going to take to get the surface sufficently abraided.
Any good quality spray primer should do. Some spray primers are now even available in black. It's about the primer bonding with the surface. After that, you can coat it with anything, though I'd stay away from jellies and jams.
