You guys are killing me!!

The obvious answer - I am only a husband. "Husband", by the way, is an old Celtic word that loosely translates to "a drone who is controlled by a spouse and whose sole functions are to go to work to make money to buy things, fix them when they break and have little unsupervised fun until they die first and early."

A dark, humorless people the ancient Celts. Gotta go, there are floors to be swept and dishes to be washed.