A couple things I should have said better/gotten right in my original post:

1) It's easy to take for granted just how cool this company is. How many other audio brands would host a forum and allow posters to openly critique their products in comparison to a competitor? Are there ANY?

When I called to get my RA code, I had the good fortune to talk to Alan. He was genuinely curious about why I was sending the speakers back, and not at all defensive, nor was he dismissive or critical about my choice. We had a nice chat about the state of speaker manufacturing, importing, and finishing. It's just so rare and refreshing to find a company that's genuinely interested in understanding its customers. I'll definitely be back.

2) It's Alan, not Allen; it's Amie, not Amy.
Soory aboot that.