It has to be a configuration problem. I have almost the same set-up except with 60s and typical dvd volume is -30 to -15, (-15 being very loud) depending on the type of movie I'm watching.
Ditch the Denon auto eq. It blows. If anything, keep the distance it set if it seems to be correct (check with a tape measure) and you might want to keep the levels it set for your speakers but definetly ditch the eq part.
You also might want to check all your connections, and then double check them. Because of time constraints, I hired a H/T installer, and he screwed a couple things up that I had to fix. My point is, its easy to mis-plug things even if you know what your doing.
