Reminds me of one of my favorite Navy jokes/tall tales/urban legends:

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This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio
conversation of a U.S. naval ship with the Canadian
authorities off the coast of Newfoundland October
1995. Radio conversation released by the Chief of
Naval Operations, 10-10-95.

Canadians:
Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South
to avoid a collision.

Americans:
Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the
North.

Canadians:
Negative. You will have to divert your course 15
degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans:
This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again,
divert YOUR course.

Canadians:
No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Americans:
THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN. THE
SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC
FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE
CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT
YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY
AGAIN,THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER
MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF
THIS SHIP.

Canadians:
We are a lighthouse, your call.

Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica.