Andrew, I wrote the topic with you in mind, and you did not (as usual) disappoint. There was a lot very naughty, funny stuff in there. Thanks for taking the time to amuse me.

OK, now that you've opened the gate to revealing things slighlty more insideous:

A small gang of us commuted from our corner of the city into downtown to go to school. Each neighborhood of the city was represented there, so it was a common sight.

On our way home on the subway, we would bring a few pieces of foam rolled up. They were about an inch thick, four inches wide and 24" long.
We would wait until a train came through that had a completely empty car.

We would position oursleves at the three sets of doors on the upcoming stop's platform side.

Just before the train would start pulling into the station, we would unfurl the foam and jam it through the door-set's rubber bumpers, so that 18-20" was now sticking outside of the train car.

As the train was pulling in, we'd see hats flying, newspapers coming apart into 40 sheets, spilled drinks, etc., etc. As sick little urban Vandals, what we really lived for was the shrieking and adults yelling F-bombs. Of course, we'd have to leap out and dash to the far exit, where we would run up the wrong way escalator and disappear into the busy streets. If you didn't grow up in a big, old city you just may not understand Urchinism.

Always call the place you live a house. When you're old, everyone else will call it a home.