The Science of Ungentlemanly Pursuits

Weird dream time. I was dreaming I was attending a holiday church service (not sure which holiday, but it was bright and sunny out) with my friend, feeling out of place, as they were making me feel unwelcome. Even little kids were coming up to me and saying I shouldn't be there... while the service was going on. Then there was some musical they were putting on. I felt like I was supposed to be part of it for some reason, so I ran up to the stage and booked it up a stairway that everyone was dancing up. I didn't really dance, but I paused a couple of times in an effort to make it look like I was following some tiny bit of choreography.

But I still felt uncomfortable, wasn't really sure why I was there. I decided to take off early. I couldn't find my friend, and he drove, so I was headed back to the vehicle to wait for him there. Some of the people had already started the potluck that was scheduled for after the service, though, and I ran into that on the way out. Suddenly there was this plastic-looking bug that popped up, a little bigger than a fist. It was flying around and without warning, curled up and began spinning while spraying SOMETHING around on everyone, me included. There was a LOT of spray. It was drenching me and kept getting me in my eyes. Naturally, we were all freaking out, since we had no idea what it was.

After the bug did it a second time, it uncurled and fell to the ground, the plastic armor falling off to reveal a tiny man.

I was suddenly researching it on the internet, and I stumbled onto a video about a scientist who was doing some off-the-wall research. I forget (or don't understand) how it was supposed to work, but I remember there being maybe 14 helicopters as well as men that were put into this compactor. It had a switch on the outside with "God" as one setting and "Opt Out" as the other. "Opt Out" was selected, but it was supposed to mean that no one was asking for God's intervention, that these things were going to be crushed together in this chamber, and God could do what he wanted without the influence of anyone's wishes.

Well, apparently some kind of intervention took place, because these miniature flying men were the result.

That's when I woke up.