I checked the fuses, they are fine. Besides, when the fuses blow (have had plenty of experience with this with the old unit) the light goes out. Now for the really bad news... my fiancee told me the light is green, indicating it is not in fault protection. So green light + zero output = ???
I think I might remove the amp to make sure the connects didn't fall off or something. That would explain why there's no sound at all coming from the sub. Anything short of that though would have me believing God doesn't want me to have bass. There would be no other explanation.