Ajax...
I am now certain that I chose the wrong word, but I can't seem to think of one more suitable right now. I am not implying that they are not responsible for the things that they got involved with, and I did not mean to imply that the forum membership in general was the "culprit". I was simply referring to the fact that a few poorly worded comments caused a huge fire storm that got out of control, and it escalated into what amounts to a huge mess. If you can somehow associate the word "victim" in that context, I think you might have a better idea of what I meant.
Having on at least one occassion put my own foot in my own mouth, and losing the respect and friendship of an individual on this board that I admire, and hold in extremely high regards in the process, I've learned to think a little more carefully about what I write. Or at least I thought I did. The fact that you, and at least one other person so far did not understand my intentions tells me I've still got work to do. There is a point to my madness. I was trying to be very general for Amie's sake, and my own since I have an opinion on why this got so out of control. I will not elaborate any further because doing so would require that I possibly offend another forum member. It takes at least 2 to tango, and my personal feelings are that things would not have escalated to the level of ugliness that they did if more of us had just said "yuck" and moved on to the next thread, or composed the next reply without commenting on the original offensive comment. I was just as offended by GD's implication that we all don't know what they heck we are talking about as the rest of you guys were. I had an unusual problem that was caused by the shape, size, and materials of my TV. I initially blamed the speaker, but further investigation proved that it wasn't the cause of the issue. I find it entirely believable that GD heard what he says he heard, but I also think he didn't take the time to find out what the REAL culprit was. But did it really need to get that far out of control? I feel that the comments he directed at you and some of the others were ENTIRELY out of line. You did NOTHING at all to deserve that. Some folks did assist with pushing him in that direction, though, and I feel that it was a small part to a larger picture. Yes, his behavior did cause the bulk of the problems, but someone took a unnecessary shot at him a while ago, and from that point on he was a stick of dynamite with an already lit fuse.
I understand the silence / consent relationship, but sometimes silence is just simply the refusal to go below a certain level.
I apologize to ANYONE who misunderstood what I meant, but I am not sure that I know how to clarify it without muddying the water even more. Amie asked for comments about conduct, and I was simply pointing out that sometimes things happen in a written forum where the lack of the tonal inflections present in spoken word cause misunderstandings, hard feelings, and overall hate and discontent. When speaking face to face with someone, we also hear what are saying when we say it, and we glean from other's facial expressions and physical reactions wether or not the intent of what we are trying to say is getting through to the person that we are speaking with. In a written forum, you write what you think you want to say, and hit send. If the other person is offended, or doesn't get your point, you have no way to know that until a heated reply comes back your way, and you go "whoaaa! what is this jerk saying?". By then it is too late, and the argument just keeps escalating and escalating. (wow... I think I just accurately described what I meant by "victim") I think if everyone involved in that thread were sitting around in the same room, drinking beer, and having the same discussion, it would have turned out differently. It would have been a very heated discussion ending either with an "oh well, we agree to disagree" or an all out rumble, followed by more sitting around tilting back more tall, cool ones...
Oh... and how I've been able to hang out on here for as long as I have without seeing that "notify moderator" link is beyond me... Can I borrow your bifocals, Jack?
