A priest woke up one Sunday morning and looked outside and saw it was a beautiful day. He decided to skip church and go play golf. So he called the junior priest at his church and told him he was sick and couldn't give the mass. The junior priest told him not to worry, he would deliver the mass.


The priest drove about 40 miles away from town to avoid being spotted. As he was setting up his first drive on the first hole, Jesus leaned over to God in heaven and asked him, "Are You going to let him get away with this?" God told Jesus not to worry, he would handle it. Right as God said that, the priest hit the drive of his life. The ball traveled all 450 feet to the green, bounced once, and rolled in the hole. The priest was ecstatic. Jesus asked God "Why would you let him do that?"
God said, "Who is he gonna tell?"















A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.